These are not gray hairs!
They’re wisdom highlights.
How is the moon similar to dentures?
They both come out at night.
What do you call someone who enjoys Mondays?
Retired.
Why aren’t koalas considered real bears?
They don’t meet the koalafications.
What do Alexander the Great and Winnie the Pooh have in common?
They have the same middle name.
I told my physical therapist I broke my arm in two places.
He told me to stop going to those places.
What do you call the wife of a hippie?
Mississippi.
What do lawyers wear to court?
A lawsuit.
What do you call it when Batman skips church?
Christian Bale.
What did the football coach say to the broken vending machine?
Give me my quarterback.
